Misogyny as a Precursor to Mass Violence… Again

Hi Joel,


I must sound like a broken record, but have pity on me–if you are tired of hearing it, imagine how tired women are of saying it.

Men who commit mass violence–and being a young man is characteristic that most mass violence actors have in common–are almost always domestic abusers first. Hate crimes begin at home, and the crime of wife beating is a misogynistic crime. It is rooted in the same toxic masculinity as other kinds of violence, fed by entitlement., grudge holding, and a wounded sense of honor.

James Alex Fields, Jr. is why we need a national domestic violence registry.

Image result for james alex fields car

Above, the murder weapon–a car–that Fields used. 

Prior to his murder of anti-racist activist Heather Heyer and his terrorist attack that harmed 19 others, Fields’ violence toward his mother prompted her to call 911 repeatedly to seek police intervention to protect her from him.

Most domestic abusers do not go on to mow strangers down with their cars. And most people who are planning acts of mass violence aren’t dissuaded from doing so because their names appear in a registry.

But a registry would allow us to keep better track of convicted offenders (who, obviously, do not represent all or perhaps even most of those who commit such acts) and allow us to move more quickly to intervene, including through gun restraining orders.  


Support your Local Nazi Hunter

Dear Joel,

Can’t bring yourself to slug a Nazi?

If you want to get out of the tension between worrying about antifa’s tactics, do your part to support the fight against fascism. You already know what it is.

Work on justice, and antics will recede–at least until we drift near fascism again.



antif flag burning

Above, an antifascist activist burns a “Thin Blue Line” flag. If this upsets you, think about what it means that some officers and their Blue Lives Matter supporters have their own flag, which desecrates the US flag according to the US flag code. Oh, and that thin blue line in the image–it represents the police officers who stand between us and anarchy. Feeling a little worried yet about police authoritarianism? 

“Daughters for Life” to meet in DC

I encourage our readers in the Washington, DC area to attend an upcoming event that supports peacemaking co-sponsered by Daughters for Life and Eastern Mennonite University’s  Center for Justice and Peacebuilding

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Daughters for Life was founded by Nobel Prize nominee Dr. Izzeldin Abuelaish, whose daughters, Bessan, 21, Mayar, 15, and Aya, 13, were killed when Israeli tanks shelled his family’s home in Gaza in 2009.  In 2011, an interview with Dr. Abuelaish appeared in the Journal for Hate Studies. In his interview (which you can find here: 157-483-1-PB), Dr. Abuelaish speaks about how we have hope in the face of tragedy and how we inculcate children against hate.

Image resultAbove, the cover of I Shall Not Hate: A Gaza Doctor’s Journey on the Road to Peace and Human Dignity shows daughters Bessan, Mayar, and Aya tracing their names in the sand on a beach. 

The organization that he founded after this violence focuses on empowering girls and young women from Israel, Jordan, Lebanon, Palestine and Syria by awarding them scholarships to study in Canada, the UK, and the US.

On September 16th, Daughters for Life and EMU are hosting a dinner honoring women working in peace building: Nobel Peace Prize winner Leymah Gbowee, Peabody Award-winning social entrepreneur and media producer Ronit Avni, and the executive director of Just Vision, Suhad Babaa. Tickets are available to support this work and celebrate these women.


Why do Christians think they need to oppress gay people?

Dear Joel,

Susan Trollinger and William Trollinger, in the English and history department of the University of Dayton, blog at Righting America, which is associated with their book Righting America at the Creation Museum (Johns Hopkins 2016), an examination of how the Creation Museum serves the interest of religious conservatives.

For our Mennonite readers, Sue and Bill might be familiar names. They were faculty at Bluffton College, and Susan is associated with the Young Center at Elizabethtown College. She is the author of Selling the Amish: The Tourism of Nostalgia (Johns Hopkins 2012) and other scholarship on Anabaptists.

Sue and Bill invited me to share some thoughts at their blog recently on the question of why conservative Christians are so invested in the battle against gay rights.  You can read my response here. 

Above, Gustav Klimt’s 1917 Adam and Eve. What kind of blasphemy is it to insist that Christianity can’t work unless its founded on heterosexuality?



Countering Hate: Make It about You

Dear Joel,

Some of our readers might know that I occasionally work with communities facing hate protest, mostly but not exclusively in response to anti-gay groups. This emerged out of my research on hate protest and counterprotest. I’ve been fortunate to get to work with people who really care about meeting hate head-on in their communities, and I’ve learned from that work.

Right now, though, I want to answer a specific question I get asked frequently: If we ignored this, would it go away? If we signaled through our actions that the behavior of Republican white supremacist rioters was silly, foolish, and unimportant, would we make it so?

No, I don’t think so. Here’s why: The audiences being targeted–nonwhites that protesters aim to terrify, whites they hope to recruit–ARE paying attention. The first set of people would be foolish not to; their survival depends upon paying attention to haters. For the second set, our messages need to overwhelm the messages of hate–both by showing that those who choose hate will face severe social penalties and by showing where the “off ramps” from hate are.

For haters, these are the goals: to intimidate, recruit, and solidify the group. Upsetting the rest of us is a bonus, one that absolutely feeds into the sense of persecution and provides a decent thrill.

More importantly, though, I think this is the wrong question.

When I work with groups planning counterprotests, many of them quickly move to questions like “How do we defeat the haters?”

But, it’s like what your therapist tells you: You can’t change other people. (You can make more noise than them, stand between them and their targets, drive them off, and make life unpleasant for them, as some lovely contemporary Nazi hunters are doing. But you can’t change their hearts and minds.)

Angel Action

Above, counterprotesters participate in an Angel Action event to stand between anti-gay protesters and those they target. 

I work to reorient people asking that. Instead of asking how you can make the haters feel defeated, ask What does my response need to say about me? What does it need to say to the people I am responsible for? 

You are not responsible for these hateful people. (Unless you are, I mean–but those aren’t usually the folks asking this question.) You ARE responsible for the people they are attacking, narrowly (the actual people of color actually living in Charlottesville, Virginia, right now) and broadly (nonwhites everywhere). The more privilege you have to exercise, the more responsible you are for exercising it.

Your response is the only thing you can control. Rather than thinking about what you want to say to haters, who are very unlikely to be convinced by your counterprotest, you must keep your focus on what you want your legacy to be here. Then you need to make it happen. 

Will you be a person who intercedes with your body to protect those under physical attack?

Will you give your money to support justice?

Will you work behind the scenes, all the time, not just when hate groups show up, to root out hatred, violence, and aggression toward others?

Will you make the powerful listen to the voices of the powerless?

Will you amplify the words of the vulnerable?

Will you make the space for them to lead? Will you follow?

If you have been doing this right all along, then what you say now will align with what you have already done to keep others safe and free. If you haven’t been fighting hate, perhaps because you’ve been denying it, this is a good time to take stock (though not to express surprise. That’s just insulting to those who have been telling you about the racism, nativism, misogyny, homophobia, and ableism they’ve been facing.) and see how your silence has allowed this hate to take hold.

Though you will read much commentary arguing that, right now, white people coming to consciousness about white supremacy shouldn’t make it about them, I’m saying make this about you.  Not in the sense that your feelings are the feelings that matter now or that you should ask people of color to clue you in. Instead, make this about what kind of person you are. Are you a person who finds racism to be good, acceptable, or tolerable, or is hatred antithetical to your values in such a way as that you will actively oppose it?

White people, this is about us–our response to a hatred we have let grow. 







Who is responsible for the Republican White Supremacist Riots*?

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Andrew Johnson, who deliberately destroyed the possibility of holding white supremacists accountable for their actions, looks down from heaven and smiles on today’s GOP. 

Dear Joel,

In light of Trump’s failure in Charlottesville, my comments are brief and less kind than yours.

Charlottesville is not a surprise or even a revelation. It is exactly what many of us who opposed Trump said would happen when he was elected because it is exactly what his supporters wanted. He was elected by people who wanted this, for the purpose of achieving it. 

You are careful not to put every Trump voter into the “basket of deplorables,” but the same spirit that animates “Make America Great Again” rallies animates the violence in Charlottesville. Not every Republican likes it when violence erupts, but everyone who voted for Donald Trump is responsible for contributing to the climate where such violence will inevitably happen. You saw it as he advocated violence against peaceful protesters at his rallies. You saw it when he failed to immediately and with revulsion reject David Duke’s endorsement. This is just another expression of allegiance to the white supremacy that Trump has eagerly embraced. There is a reason why the mother of the young man who plowed his car into a crowd, killing one peaceful protester and injuring 19 more, thought her son was at a Trump rally: it’s because this white supremacist violence, which has always been there, was emboldened by Trump’s administration.

Does Trump, who has Jewish grandchildren those protesters would kill in gas chambers, believe in the white supremacy that had the protesters chanting Nazi slogans? That does not matter. Look: the man cannot denounce the Nazis who would kill his own grandchildren because he cannot bear to lose their adoration. With narcissism like that, you don’t need to feel racist to produce evil.

Trump can’t say “no” to this violence because this is his base: white men who see the threat to their unearned privilege as a cause worth killing for.

And he can’t say “no” to this because, even if he did, he would be a liar, and we now have more than a year of his flirtation with Nazis and Klansmen as evidence of it.

This is the culmination of Nixon’s Southern Strategy: to win the South by fostering white and resentment. Do not let Republicans be embarrassed by it now. It’s what they’ve chosen, year and year.  Every Republican who does not want to own this should, right now, speak against not just the violence in Virginia but a party, not just a president, who prefer Andrew Johnson over Abraham Lincoln.

Will they?

Why would they? In the absence of solutions to our common problems, a politics of white resentment is all they have.


*Thanks to my friend Todd for the language here.




White Supremacy Brings us to War, Again


One final thought about abortion and the current administration’s pissing contest in North Korea:

For folks who believe that women who choose abortion are making a selfish choice, you are usually right. In the vast majority of abortions, women are choosing to have abortions because they don’t want the children their pregnancies would produce, and they don’t want those children because those children will impede the lives they want to live. They are choosing the lives they want–free from this pregnancy and that child, right now–over pregnancy and parenthood. That is selfish in the sense that the choice focuses on their happiness, safety, and financial security. (Are there other reasons why women have abortions? For sure. But for most women choosing an abortion, the procedure isn’t a matter of their health but of their preference not to be a mother (usually again) right now.)

For folks who believe that the cost of a woman choosing the life she wants is too high–that that choice in fact comes at the cost of another human’s life–war should outrage you even more because it excuses killing other people for far less of a useful reason: to show that you can.

Why should the US be fighting a war? Why should we be talking about dropping a bomb in North Korea? Only for selfish reasons–and reasons that are not simply selfish but entirely immaterial because our lives will not improve if we bomb North Korea. At least a woman who is exercising her right to get an abortion is probably going to see her life improve because of it. (This isn’t to say that women don’t have ambivalent feelings about their abortions or that there aren’t negative personal consequences to abortion. But most women are relieved that they made the decision they did.)

Image result for american flag middle finger

Above, an extended middle finger, covered in the stars and stripes of the US flag, the symbol of what Joel has called the “Effyouacracy,” has shown up repeatedly in online conversations I’ve been following about whether and why the US should drop a nuclear bomb on North Korea. What is this worrisome threatening and posturing about except proving that we have a “real man” as a president, as one Trump Deplorable shared in a post. 

Racism, sexism, xenophobia, and a politics of resentment (and potentially collusion with Russia) gave us this fool of a president. There are Americans among us–60 million of them–who will destroy the world through nuclear war in order to insure that white people get to feel powerful.

What is more selfish than that?